What am I going to write about?!
Well yeah, it’s all life.
Love, lust, sex, fantasy, romance, passions, dreams, enlightenment?!
I know nothing of the sort.
I only know how to push these buttons and make words appear on a screen. Yet, somehow these words can inspire me. Somehow these words can drive me. Somehow these words can light a fire within me so deep that it will burn intensely for days. Somehow!
Which words though? Do I really want to find out?! Is it even possible to create all those feelings without it starting with something sexual?! I don’t know. And that is the question!! When I can answer that honestly, when I can find that thing, that set of words, that drives me beyond the erotic world, then shall I have something worthy of being said.
It must be said though, I won’t ever stop writing about sex. I can’t. I know this for a fact. Because, if I can’t write about sex, how else am I to deal with all the emotions that are stirred. The boiling lust, the longing grief, the desire so consuming it must come out, and in words, it must. I mustn’t ever stop.
I shall continue the attempt at finishing a short story, that seems doable, somewhat. Even if it is just “all about the sex”, at least I will have finished something!
God help me.
*puts down phone, walks away shaking head, muttering: “will I ever learn?”*